It’s Time to get your Mojo Back, Mummy!
Remember BC? Before Children? Your career was on track, you had money, a social life and you had a laugh! You were confident, FUN, the life and soul of the party. The possibilities were endless. You could drop everything and do a ‘Through-ee’ (stay up all night) working on a project if you had to.
And then you had kids. Things changed. Your priorities were confused. You had no time for anything. You suddenly doubted yourself. Essentially…
You lost your MOJO!
When Esther Stanhope went back to work at the BBC after her second child, (Truman is now 4) she lost her mojo. For some reason the second time round felt worse than the first. Seriously, something happens when you go on maternity leave. She felt like she was wilting
She used to mingle with celebrities like George Clooney, Boris Johnson and Nigella Lawson, produced a live show, fired on all cylinders, she was vivacious and full of energy.
10 months later she felt frumpy, dumpy and full of self-doubt. She wondered where the heck Esther had disappeared. Sound familiar?
"I wish someone had sat me down and shared a few CONFIDENCE tips with me then" says Esther
"I meet mums all the time who want to get back in the swing of things but something is missing … What is it?"
You feel:
– Your personality has been left outside the door.
– The sparkle, the va va voom , whatever it is you need to ‘work it’ is missing
– Out of shape
– You’ve lost your sense of humour
– A little bit grouchy and maybe a bit sad too
– Your brain is like mush
– You can’t remember your passwords!
– There’s no time for you
– GUILTY.
You feel like a wispy shadow of your former self
So how do you get your MOJO back?
Here are Esther's top 3 ‘Get your Mummy Mojo Back’ TIPS, are you ready?
Tip 1 – Put You First (without the guilt)
This is NOT selfish it’s essential. A happy mum means a happy home (yes you’ve heard that one before). If working makes you happy, you owe it to yourself and your family to follow your dream. Go for it, do what makes you happy.
You are a better person when you do what you love. You have to love what you do and if that's work, go on, do it!
Stop trying to please everyone.
Tip 2 – Get Domestic Help Now!
Sort out childcare. Ouch! You ‘re thinking, “I wouldn’t even break even with these extortionate nursery fees.”
Listen -it’s only temporary; you‘ll earn a lot more in future if you ‘invest’ in that time NOW!
Have you got a cleaner? Get one now, it’s an investment; your time is more precious than the cost of a cleaner. If you have helpful family or friends, ask them a favour. Maybe they can take the kids off your hands for an hour, or cook once a week.
Tip 3 – Create TIME. Don’t be a time bomb waiting to explode.
Time is against the working mum. We try and run from work to nursery, from school to meeting in a sweat. Do not cram and arrange back-to-back meetings.
Ange works for the government, she went back after her third child and was quickly heading towards a nervous breakdown.
“I’m so busy, I have to cram in so many meetings, I am so stressed”
Esther gave her a few words of wisdom.....“STOP , how much time do you have between meetings ? None? “
From that moment on Ange's whole life turned around. She factored in time for herself – just a few extra minutes between appointments. No Meeting has to run it’s full 60 minutes.
By making a few changes Ange…
– got there first, putting her in control of the meeting.
– Had space to prepare her messages
– HAD to deliver succinct messages with impact to make the most of her 45 mins.
– Could go to the loo and do her make up so she looked fabulous
– Wasn’t flustered, but could smile and command the room
Remember – the real you hasn’t left the building. You’re still in there, and while having a family is everything to you (and you get huge points for all you’ve done!) …you’re important too.
So when you do go back to work, take control, and give yourself TIME to get your MOJO back.
Be the vivacious, the enchanting and the funny you, back in the saddle. You’ll feel effing fabulous!
If you want some fantastic 'make me feel fabulous' free practical video tips sign up at www.estherstanhope.com
Or come and see Esther live at Mumsnet Workfest on May 16th in London - there are still a few places left